i unknowingly set off a behavior in the congresswoman's disabled daughter yesterday and she started kicking and screaming and had to be restrained. the feds are coming for me.

a real text from kmarcum's sister, who was never heard from again

he called the shit poop!

evan, later tonight

why fix [the problem] when you can just work around it?

heath

iPhone 5C: For the colorful.

Apple's actual marketing slogan for their low-end phone

Public networks are less private than private networks [...]

protip, vagrant docs

Is tha the new Zune?

heath, on Azure

Abomidlvle

heath

It's like herpes, not a great gift, but it's the thought that counts

rob

I started having a crazy idea in the fourth inning that Richard Nixon was the home plate umpire, and once I thought I was pitching a baseball to Jimi Hendrix, who to me was holding a guitar and swinging it over the plate.

Dock Ellis, doin it right