i'm usually the one badgering people into doing a thing
.@BrachsCandyUSA have unveiled their unholy trio of new brunch-flavored candy corn flavors https://t.co/HH8VLa26LF pic.twitter.com/o5zfOQHmSH
— Paste Magazine (@PasteMagazine) September 21, 2016
You’ll have to either take my word for this or ask someone else.
— Thomas H. Ptacek (@tqbf) September 21, 2016
The new tunnel boring machine, "Driller Mike" named for Atlanta's own @KillerMike is officially on! pic.twitter.com/gziU7FT7ns
— City of Atlanta, GA (@CityofAtlanta) September 21, 2016
can’t wait to high five you on my way to our seats.
— Brandon Valentine (@bvalentine615) September 21, 2016
don't call the sheriff's office when you scare someone and they snatch up your clown hind-end.
I dont know when the last time you had to invert a binary search tree, but it wasn't at a job.
the first sign of getting old is when you hear some music and find yourself saying 'what in the hell are these kids listening to?'
The bags were discovered by thieves who tried to snatch them. As all New Yorkers know, if you see something, steal something.
As a middle aged man, I wish there was an app that alerts you when you start to tell a story that you have already told to the same person.
I'm tired. My feet hurt. And this bitch is slippin'
you is snacks?