@acontinuouslean Martinis are like a woman's breasts. One is not enough, but three is too many.
— The Rules (@rules_unbornson) February 9, 2014
@carrieunderwood Can you go back into said bathroom, please? Thanks.
— Cell Block 303 (@Cellblock303) February 9, 2014
That awkward moment when you go to the bathroom and your husband scores a goal for the @PredsNHL
— Carrie Underwood (@carrieunderwood) February 9, 2014
I have a lot more insight into why Tumblr is the way it is now (horrible). Its basic structure obstructs conversation & rewards posing.
— St. Rev. Dr. Rev âï¸â¯ï¸🏴😻 (@St_Rev) February 4, 2014
Dear Microsoft, please shut down codeplex and automatically migrate everything to github.
— Kevin (@kev_nz) February 7, 2014
Want to feel old? Butts were invented 40 years ago today
— Matt Novak (@paleofuture) February 5, 2014
"The problem is I've been living in my parents' basement so my alcohol tolerance is low." -Daniel
— Nate Baker (@nathanTbaker) February 5, 2014
Nashville Fire Dept. chief says the pilot made a hard right turn and saved many lives by avoiding the YMCA building and a retirement home.
— WSMV 4 Nashville (@WSMV) February 4, 2014
